Encouraging Q&A with an Adoptive Family

At Spirit of Faith Adoptions, we are blessed to walk alongside families as they discover the beauty of adoption. Julie and Ed graciously shared their story to help bring encouragement and clarity about what open adoption can really look like. Read through their encouraging answers below:

Question: Before your adoption journey began, what did you think open adoption would be like, and how has your actual experience been different?

Answer: Adoption was a new concept for both of us. We really didn’t have any experience or family connections to adoption. We feel that most of our understanding was derived from what we had been exposed to both culturally and through media. Our perception of open adoption made us anxious because we were unsure of what the relationship would look like. We were worried that the relationship would be awkward and uncomfortable. Today our son is 14 years old and we have the most amazing relationship with our birth mother. She has always wanted what was best for him and has made our relationship very special and unique. We visit with her annually and send pictures to her each Christmas. We also have a website for our family that gives her a window into his world.

Question: What are some of the biggest misconceptions you’ve heard about open adoption, and how would you respond to them based on your family’s story?

Answer: We feel the biggest misconception was how the relationship between us and our birth mother would be established. This is God’s story that he has written for us and no one else's. Through thoughtful prayer, we were able to honor what made both her and us comfortable. There is no contract or legal binding obligation – it is simply a relationship that is bonded together forever because of our love and respect for this woman. We wanted this relationship to be open for both her and for our adopted son.

Question: How has open adoption been a blessing for your child, and what difference do you see it making in their life?

Answer: Neither one of us will ever take parenthood for granted. Daily we give thanks to our birth mother for being so selfless and choosing both life and adoption for our son. He is our greatest blessing and joy. He is a thriving, six foot, fifteen year old teenager. He is athletic and musical. He loves to sing in the school choir and play piano. He plays multiple sports and enjoys math and science. We adore him for his big, kind heart. He loves to hunt and fish with dad and is quite the snow skier. We are grateful for the many adventures we have taken as a family and the memories we continue to create together.  

Question: What has surprised you most about building a relationship with your child’s birth family?

Answer: We feel what has surprised us the most about our relationship is how comfortable we feel when we are all together. This started from day one when she was admitted to the hospital and called us so that we could be there for our son’s birth. All the research we had read informed us that it was so important for us to show her that we trusted her and wanted to honor her needs after she placed him with us.  

Question: What encouragement would you give to other families who may feel nervous or unsure about open adoption?

Answer: Adoption has been a spiritual journey for us. We would encourage others to turn to their faith as they embark on this process. An open adoption begins with what you as the adoptive parents along with the birth parents both need and are comfortable navigating. Listen to your heart and listen to God. These conversations take courage but we must remember that this is all part of God’s story and his plan for our families. Also, please know that this agency, Spirit of Faith, is here for you. We felt that Stacy, along with our social worker, provided great guidance to us as we embarked on this journey. This agency reflects nothing but love and compassion for each of us, and is a true testament of God’s work.  

At Spirit of Faith Adoptions, we are grateful for families like Julie’s who remind us that adoption is more than a process. It’s a story of faith, love, and lifelong connection.